Pain is real and beautiful

    One day a girl wake up in the middle of world where definitely don't identify herself. But struggle is real,pain is real,joy is real also sorrow. So what to do? Fight/accept/run/lie/cry/laugh/hate/love/ignore/suffer/feel/numb.. where to end,When to ends ?
 
      Best things to do.. screw it there is no best thing no right or wrong but there is action and you are the master of yourself. Life is beautifully painful if you see the pattern and in any circumstances you have always chance to do live or die. Your  believes, fears, conscious not let you progress . Reality hard to accept and it's mostly harsh but when you start live with it, all burdens melt from your gut and inhale life much different much intense meantime much simple but volunteerly. There is nothing beautiful living life aware more than anything and beautiful shouldn't be always positive but you already know it.

Every emotion needed in balance

We keep chase happiness and escape sadness as much as we can that we forget what happiness is. Opposite means part of whole, named better than other make harder to accept, selfishness me me me manipulated minds moves to other line. What's all about this fuss then?
Compassion,
We don't have to be sad of course but when time comes we should accept sorrow feel and live then let it go, if we loose someone we love we should accept being sad,angry,desperate but not cling just live and embrace the feelings whatever it brings. Then we can live freely,much more aware and calm.
About sadness; imagine you diagnosed cancer and start your therapy and want some company around you , people who loves you feel SAD and make empathy that feeling bring them to you, feel your pain,share and turns to love and your pain decrease.
If there is no such a feeling sadness we can't feel joy, joy makes you happy boost your mood feeling alive but every magic comes with a price and doesn't mean sadness is evil or dead,just what it is. Even sadness has sour taste and makes you keep cry and die but after you realise sadness makes you appreciate random things and feeling joy deeply

INSIDE OUT

   Night off..

   Prejudice is added our lives like something sentimental 😏 of course don't forget contribution of media. Where is free press ? money bought it when you 're busy with late capitalism. Human being laziest living creature ever, if there is a ready stuff no need to questioning or deny if no necessary. Not about to making lives easier on the contrary under the name "joy" manipulative basic things hidden our souls. Introduce me with you "ego"love me,like me, me,me,me. Harmony is important thing if we want to move on our lives with peace. So nothing bad about to be loved or desires but extreme is harm to others mostly, indeed it is.
Anyway, this show " night of" shows us how we can judge easily without knowledge or proof and cost someone's life or a race/nation/religion believer. Easy to judge, easy to make decisions for ignorant people. But when you put aside your all prejudice and look to other person just a human being once, maybe you see much clear much human..

      1,2,3.. FARGO

     Based on true story in Minnesota but names changed to respect who died while happened. Its 3 season different from each other but kinda connected. Especially put this photo that you understand when you are closer to 3 season finale. If i point my perspective about seasons ;

season 1:  sometimes desperation on ordinary people when they kept humiliated by their belongings they expose toxic like volcano and this season it shows in Martin Freeman's eyes addition Lorne Malvo is of my favorite character 

season 2 : again simple can be most dangerous,never underestimated old roots. Respect is the key, not everything achieved by money even in money's world. Focus on native american man,he is best

season 3 : when diplomacy fight with brain,meantime family is everything they say,obviously not every time, also smart people always look for sincerity and pure souls not corrupted toys

  

let me introduce with you WASP the wonder woman 

Recently finished millennium series,highly recommended if you didn't read yet. Probably you watched first book's movie which directed by David Fincher well even one of my favorite director still in the book you find a bit different world. I must say,myself kinda love Scandinavian system and human/women rights over there unfortunately some researches shows us in Sweden still women rights ignored by system and some nationalistic movements force to control all over society.But free independent press and many humanist people support human rights in balance. These books based on a story connected each other (which is not real) but still Larsson tried to shows us some facts. About author , a man who is feminist/humanist also fought to extreme right wing and well traveled,lived pretty minimal, died at  2004

http://stieglarsson.com/background/

 smurf style shrimp soup
 ( Caldinho de camarão)

First time I tasted this delicious devil ,I couldn't believe that I had in plastic glass somewhere on the beach at north of Brasil. Then i was curious about ,kept looked for recipe at Web but all recipes are portougese and translation not gives you original and some ingredients can't found beyond the ocean even original recipe belong Portugal but still keep the spirit alive and give a chance to yourself,right :)  luckyly found a recipe belong to portougese chef who wrote in English, some details and ingredients can't find easily but no problem because taste same as delicious as I had at that beach that day 😎

Ingredients :
1 kg shrimp (little pink ones not jumbo)
1 stalk celery
1 big onion
2 small carrots
1 big potato
Salt to taste
Black pepper to taste
2 tbsp butter
2 tbsp manioc flour or corn flour

Process :
Leave the shells all shrimps, put in pressure cooker pot add 2 lt water ,add celery,carrots ,peel potato and onion and add in it. Turn on heat when it started to boil turn off the heat after 20 minutes, rinse all ingredients just take carrots and potato gentle put in broth then put aside.put a pan on heat add butter, melted but not burn then put all shrimps, cook 2 minutes ör less take half of them add in broth. Blender all ingiridetens then start to cook again keep stir dont let burn to bottom, put salt and black pepper to taste when it becomes ticky enough turn off the heat, optional you can put some manioc or corn flour but not have to. After all put some in a bowl and add a few shrimp on top then serve 😇

Afiyet olsun 😎

If you don't have bowl in the kitchen here is an idea 

"bread bowl" 

Ingredients:

Whole wheat bread round shaped
3 or 4 big riped tomatoes
5 cloves of garlic
3 tbsp butter maybe a bit more
Bunch of fresh basil
Graded cheese can be cheddar or something to melt easily but not hard or bitter /edam or gouda recommended
Salt to taste
Olive oil 2 or 3 tbsp

PROCESS :
Cut top of bread and take all of inside , try to take all of inside think you re making an empty bowl ,cut all inside of bread shape like finger can be a bit thicker. Put aside all bread and crumbs
Cut the tomatoes a few pieces then use blender smash it till it looks like puree, put olive oil inside pan with 3 garlic cloves before that smash the garlics,  when garlic is dead it bitterness gone takes 1 or 2 minutes max  put all  tomatoes puree  if you have some pepper paste at home you can add too only half of spoon if not that's OK. Grade a pinch of salt and black pepper then close the pan after once boil turn to heat minimum wait.  Put butter into other pan add 2 smashed  garlic after 1 minute turn off heat, take bread crumbs shaped like finger dip garlic butter but not soaked just touch then line on the baking sheets , wait a bit get cooler after that sprink graded cheese on bread crumbs.
Take a bit butter and put inside of empty bread very thin line you can use your hand.
Heat the oven 200 cantigrad put empty bread and crumbs around 10 min check it if cheese melted and crumbs get slightly brownish that's done. Turn heat off and put a few stalk of basil leave one stalk for decoration,mix all the tomato sauce then put inside empty bread put one stalk basil middle of that. To serve use bamboo tray if you have and put all crumbs around bread.

Bon apetit :)

 how you make homemade fresh mozzarella? 

       Well,sometimes you want to go fancy Italian restaurant and eat some delicious stuff. On the other hand nothing gives you the joy something to eat what you make/cook at home by yourself. Now i am going to give you the recipe homemade mozzarella 

Ingredients ;

3 liter buffalo milk (buffalo because it gives creamy fat and whiteness but if you use cow's one do not expect something that white or creamy but still delicious) 

1,5 tsp citric acid (you can find at supermarkets easily looks like crystals)

1/4 tsp liquid rennet 

kitchen food thermometer 

PROCESS

around 300 ml warm drinking water put all citric acid inside and start to mix till all citric acid melt,

put all milk inside a pot and add citric acid mix,put bowl on the heat mix with spoon once or twice then check temperature when it shows 32 Centigrade degree, take the pot from heat put rennet (before that mix rennet with half glass of water ) close with pot's lid wait around 7 minutes open the lid shake a bit if it looks jelatin and separated from water that means ok if it's not close the lid wait more 5 minutes. With sharp knife cut that jelatine (citric acid gives that form) each one like 5 cm small squares  then mix occasionally with spoon put on the heat check temperature when it shows 41 Centigrade take from heat, use a filter separated all curds from water and keep the water (which is whey we use later in different recipes) put some water in the bowl and heat till 85 centigrade ,meantime put some ices almost half of bowl to another bowl, then take curds from filter start to stretch and fold put into hot water then fold and stretch again again don't forget wear a decent pair of kitchen gloves :) check the curd if its between 55-60 centigrade stop to folding. if you want to make ball shape here is the trick ,take all curds on your fist start to squeeze from bottom and burst from top,put that ball inside hot water cut that with your other hand then all of that balls put inside to ice bowl.Wait 5 minutes then put into a jar with cold water all your fresh mozzarella :) do not keep into refrigerator more that 5 days i highly recommend eat fresh as much as you can :) 

Bon apetit  😇